Captain Ronzo and the Thirsty Pirates
For the whole gut-wrenching, bone crushing band history, read on (based on a true story):
October 2004 Captain Ronzo plays his first solo show in the basement of Apocalypse Lounge in Manhattan
December 2004 Captain Ronzo records a four-song demo while back in Chicago with old Beardicus Enormous bandmates, Geezercus Enormous and Copernicus Sideburnicus
2005-2006 Captain Ronzo continues writing pirate songs and playing occasional acoustic shows (yarr! the times and dates are all a fog now). He also performs and records many Christmas songs during this time - Captain Ronzo's Thirsty Christmas (see the youtube videos)
January 2007 - Captain Ronzo shanghais a crew of Thirsty Pirates to wreak havoc and plunder countless kegs of ale in New York City. The Thirsty Pirates were originally Oh Zee flailing away on the bass and Georgey George pounding on the Drums.
March 2007 - Oh Zee, in a drunken rage, jumps overboard to get a lap dance from a mermaid. He is never seen again, but the sailors say that sometimes late in the night they can still hear him clinking together 40 oz. bottles and banging on a bongo drum. The captain finds a new bass player, Duff, on the Pirates for Hire bulletin board and convinces him to join the crew with tales of drunkenness, debauchery and a chest full of gold and jewels buried somewhere near the Myrtle Avenue subway stop.
April 2007 Georgey George becomes so grumpy and ill-tempered that even the most ruthless bloodthirsty pirate would rightly shun him. After a show at the Siberia Bar, He starts some ridiculous argument about the gauge of my guitar strings and storms off in a huff never to heard from again. Our next show is played with the illustrious Slink Moss filling in on the drums. We do another show as an acoustic duo, which is surprisingly well received. Then Oh Zee returns from the murky deep to rejoin the Thirsty Pirates, this time on the drums.
June 2007 - The Captain battles a horrific cancerous tumor and comes out the victor or so it would seem. Aye, but the recovery from surgery be slow and treacherous - pain and agony he would not wish on his worst enemy - Ee gads!
December 2007 -Captain Ronzo releases 14 Christmas music videos on You Tube - solo acoustic versions of all your holiday favorites. He also does a rollicking Christmas show with OhZee at the Cake Shop, NYC.
February 2008 -The Thirsty Pirates are finally back in action with a new drummer, Rich, who, believe it or not, was once the trumpet player in Alaska's finest ska band, Nervis Rex. 'Tis true, young pirates, truth is stranger than fiction!!!
March 2008 - Captain Ronzo releases a dozen or so music videos of himself singing in the shower on YouTube - acoustic versions of all the Thirsty Pirates classics and other rock favorites.
April 2008 - The Thirsty Pirates record their first album, "Heavy Seas and Hard Drinking" at Danny Screams Studio in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. The band also releases several music videos of live performances at Otto's Shrunken Head Tavern on YouTube.
Rich announces he must leave the band in May and move to North Carolina on important government business.
May 2008 -Rich dives overboard off the coast of North Carolina, never to be seen again. The Thirsty Pirate ship sails into a fog of chaos. A different phantom crew appears to be on board every time the ghost ship is sighted! 'Tis madness indeed!!!
June 2008 - Shakes, a crazy, half-Brazilian pirate punk from the Bronx, formerly of the NYC punk band, Flake Ave. joins the crew.
July 2008 - Oh Zee quits the band again, partially because the Captain ate the last piece of chicken at the weekly pirate feast.
August 2008 - Captain Ronzo returns to performing solo as the search for a new drummer comes up empty-handed. The search continues.....
Spring 2009 - James Velez starts drumming for the Thirsty Pirates.
June 2009 - The Thirsty Pirates record 6 songs at Danny Screams Studio in Williamsburg
Fall 2009 - Shakes becomes unreliable, showing up late for a show and missing several rehearsals. James and Shakes are always fighting. James says he's quitting the band. The band plays only a few shows in the next year. Captain Ronzo continues to play a lot of solo shows.
May 2010 - Captain Ronzo tours the midwest for 2 weeks with the Galt Line
August 2010 - Captain Ronzo tours the midwest for 1 week with the Galt Line
September 2010 - Captain Ronzo tours the midwest for 3 weeks with the Galt Line
June 2011 - The Thirsty Pirates Reunion show at Otto's Shrunken Head
September 2011 - Last Thirsty Pirates show (Shakes doesn't show up and Captain Ronzo and James play as a two piece) Captain Ronzo decides to abandon his command
